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The Stories We Tell & The Meanings We Make

Episode #1098: In this episode of the Arete Coach Podcast, Terrie Lupberger, an ICF Master Certified Coach (MCC), Executive Coach, CEO of Terrie Lupberger and Associates, and Senior Instructor at the University of Miami, discusses her journey from the US Department of Treasury to coaching, her experience with Newfield, and the lessons and insights she has learned through her many years in the coaching industry. During the episode, neuroscience, storytelling, ontological coaching, and what it means to be meaning-makers are discussed. Continue reading for powerful personal mantras, high-impact questions, and a new perspective on the future of coaching.

About Terrie Lupberger, MCC

Terrie Lupberger is an ICF Master Certified Coach (MCC), Executive Coach, CEO of Terrie Lupberger and Associates, and Senior Instructor at the University of Miami. As an MCC, Terrie combines 20 years of global leadership and management experience with her executive coaching and change management expertise to bring forth the very best in her coaching clients. She coaches clients with an expansive body of knowledge, tools, and unique processes to better support them in navigating their challenges and generating greater impact. In her coaching, she utilizes emotional intelligence, conscious leadership principles, and quantum theory.

Today, she is the Program Director and Co-facilitator of the Coach Partnerships Team Coaching Certification Program. She is the Co-Facilitator of the Disruptive Change Maker, a virtual three-month online program for coaches, leaders, and other change-makers that brings quantum-based theory into business practice. Terrie also Co-Facilitates the Executive Sanctuary, a development program for nonprofit CEOs.

Since 2013, Terrie has been a Senior Instructor at the University of Miami’s certified Professional Coaching Program. Since 2010, Terrie has been the Director of Training with the Coach Partnership, which offers the Newfield Coaching Program in Asia.

Terrie is especially passionate about working with women to help them navigate the unique professional and personal challenges they face and help them make the impact they know they’re capable of.

Key highlights

“The brilliance of coaching is a safe space to explore possibilities”

Timestamp 13:12

Terrie makes a powerful statement on the purpose of coaching. She states that “the brilliance of coaching is a safe space to explore possibilities… and where else do we have that in our life?” She goes on to explain that everyone her clients interact with has an “agenda” or opinion of how they should move forward in life. However, as a coach, Terrie works to have no agenda for her clients which gives them the “safe space to explore possibilities.”

The stories we create

Timestamp 15:53

In their discussion of Terrie’s personal mantras, Terrie explains that “human beings love” to “make up narratives and stories;” and that once you release this, “you’ve got more room to move.” When working with women in business, she shares that she often works on examining “the stories, the narratives, that we tell ourselves.” Terrie shares that many stories have been given to women from their culture and these stories tell women about their “role and capabilities and what [they] shouldn’t and should be like.” By acknowledging the stories that clients tell themselves, Terrie helps “bust all those narratives” and claim what works for them as an “individual.”

“Human beings are meaning makers”

Timestamp 24:35

As Terrie’s variety of coaching approaches and completed training courses are discussed, Terrie shares that through all of her coaching methods, there is the question of “what does it mean to be a human being?” She explains that “human beings are meaning makers… We need meaning, we make meaning out of our lives.” Because of this, Terrie believes that coaches should “explore what is meaningful” for their clients. Furthermore, as coaching clients make meanings, it’s important for coaches to help their clients identify what meanings serve them and which ones don’t.

The tool of compassion

Timestamp 34:51

When asked about what tools Terrie uses in her coaching, Terrie shares that the tool she uses most regularly is “deep, deep compassion for the human being” in front of her. Terrie explains that this is “critical” for her coaching. She states, “I just love who [my clients] are and what they’re up to and the humanity through it all… just a deep compassion for the human experience.”

Being mindful of the stories we listen to

Timestamp 43:39

Not only are the stories we create for ourselves important but the stories we listen to from others matter as well. Terrie shares that she is “very mindful of what stories” she will “listen to from others.” Because of this, she doesn’t spend much time on social media. While she works to be aware of what is going on in the world, she is cautious about the stories she listens to from others.

Choosing coaching clients that fit your coaching style

Timestamp 49:28

After being asked how her coaching has changed over time, Terrie shares that she is more selective about the clients she takes in to coach and that her questions as a coach are more “refined” and “deeper.” After being asked for an example of when she discovered that a potential client was not a good fit for her coaching style, Terrie shares an example from her time working with a teaching hospital. She explains that a doctor was “very suspicious” of coaching and didn’t understand that she was “not gonna tell him what to do.” While the doctor would ask for tips and models, Terrie would explain that that was not the process of coaching. Eventually, she ended the coaching relationship and comments that mentoring, teaching, or training might have been a better fit for that client specifically.

Download the transcript

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